Top ten reasons why Mother's Day puts me in a funk every year...
10) I usually have to figure out flowers for the kids to give their mothers at church which doesn't seem fair.
9) I have to buy my mom a gift (I am terrible at picking out gifts so that stresses me out). And this year I wanted to get her something good because her mom died a month ago and she is grieving.
8) All my mommy friends don't seem to have butts the size of Texas, like me.
7) Around Mother's Day I usually have a freak out session on my kids because of self imposed stress, wondering if I'm a good enough mother.
6) I have to face the fact that I'm a 35 year old mother of four. Ouch.
5) Is Mother's Day always on Sunday? It feels like it is. Holidays and Sundays running together are hard.
4) I grieve for friends and family who wanted a baby this year and didn't get one.
3) (*new this year) I think about Evangeline's birth mother and it makes me sad. Sad that she didn't want Evie or sad that she did... I can't explain but it's not black and white. I know that giving up Evie had to break her heart.
2) I think about all the motherless children in the world and feel badly that some days I fantasize about going to work full-time in an effort to get away from my kids.
1) I'm afraid that someone is going to out me...that I'm not really mother material.
The good news is I'm slowly getting out of my funk, hugging my kids, and moving on to obsess about something else.